Six Strangers, One Retreat And An Outcome You Might Not Expect

Solo travel as a woman can feel daunting. Look no further than Charlize Theron's recent film Apex, the existence of a Solo Female Travel Safety Index, or the seemingly never-ending horror stories in the news for evidence of why. And yet, it might just be the thing many of us need most. A space to step away from everything and everyone, and remember, or perhaps discover for the first time, who we actually are. Ideally without a crazed Taron Egerton chasing us down with a harpoon. Sorry, spoiler.

On a positive note, searches for "women solo travel" are at a 15-year high, with solo female travellers outnumbering men almost two to one. On a less positive note, around 70% of women still report travel-related anxiety. So if you are not quite ready to book a solo flight and figure it out from there, an organised retreat offers a far less intimidating entry point. Five days at the Marnie Rays surf camp showed me the benefits of a solo surf trip extend well beyond learning to surf, though that alone is a considerable draw.

You may already know the name. Grounded Guest Editor Lindsey Holland is the founder and host behind Marnie Rays. "So many of us are quietly searching for reconnection, to ourselves, to each other, to something that makes us feel alive again. And that's how Marnie Rays Surf and Wellness Retreat was born," she writes in her own piece on why she created the space.

"It grew from heartbreak, but it’s now my greatest joy — a space for women to show up exactly as they are. Some come to rest, some to grow, some to find courage, and some just to breathe again. Through surfing, shared meals, laughter and quiet moments by the sea, they find what I once went searching for: themselves."

Of the six of us lined up along the shore on day one, we could collectively count a couple of holiday boogie-board lessons between us. Total beginners to a sport that, in my opinion, takes considerably more nerve than your average gym session. And yet there we all were, trying something new, together, which is quite a rare sight, especially amongst strangers. United not by work, age, school, a shared friendship group or even the same home country, but by the simple desire to do something different to our everyday.

What happened next was unexpected. Laughter. Cheering each other on to stand up (harder than it looks, by a significant margin). Quick check-ins to make sure everyone was holding up while hauling boards back out through the waves, with women whose names we were still trying to remember. It turns out that sea water streaming from your nose, bloodshot eyes and faceplant after faceplant into the Atlantic breaks down social barriers remarkably quickly. All sense of embarrassment essentially gone within the first twelve hours. Arguably before that, given that few things feel quite as exposing as squeezing into a wetsuit in a car park.

Bonds were beginning to form. And though each of us led very different lives, a theme started to emerge. Every one of us was there for a version of the same reason: to break away from the everyday and see just how far our bodies (and minds) could go. Surfing, yoga, long lunches and coffee runs in a small Portuguese coastal town provided exactly that. After just five days, the women we had been cheering for felt far from strangers. Proof that you do not need to arrive with your own group for a great girls' trip.

I am not promising you will leave with best friends for life, though you might. What I can say is that you will probably come back with a quiet confidence in yourself, a willingness to step outside your comfort zone and a genuine belief that your body can do things you never thought possible. Plus, the realisation that many of us, no matter how different on paper, are all experiencing the highs and lows that life throws, and getting back up and at it wave after wave.

And if you came here purely for the surfing? A few of the group are already looking into buying their own boards. I think that says enough.

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Book a Marnie Rays retreat here